Showbiz Made Desperate

Wednesday, 2 April 2008

Got A Job? This Is What You Missed!

Three cheers for the ITV press office. Just because you may have to spend your lives at a 10 till 6 it doesn’t mean you have to mess out on the pressing issues of the day! For example, Jordan’s tits! I’m sure we can all agree this is an unbeatable use of This Morning's viewing hours. I feel no further comment is necessary as Phil and Fern have done such a top job...


Fem: “Let’s talk about your bosoms. When did you go and have them done?”

Katie: “December. I had my Teeth, nose and boobs done. Call me mad but yeah.”

Fem: “So they were 32 FF and now they’re 32D?”

Katie: “Do you know, this is the thing, I mean you would know, in different shops they’re different sizes. So I don’t really know what my size is but they are smaller.”

Fern: “Are you happy with them?”

Katie: “No I’m going back in June. They look alright in clothes and everything but I’ve had 2 doctors look at them, when I lie down they’re not quite right.

Phillip: “In what way?”

Katie: “I don’t think he’s sewn them enough here” (indicates to the side of her boobs). They sort of go under my armpits a little bit.”

Fern: “For a lot of us that’s just reality.”

Phillip: “Welcome to the real world”

Katie: “But he hasn’t filled the space properly. When you go and pay all of that money and you go to what you think is the best doctor, you expect a good job.”

Fern: “I remember you were talking about doing it a couple of years ago, probably before Junior was born actually. And then Junior came along and you couldn’t have it done. You were concerned about the anchor scars.”

Katie: “Oh I’ve got that.”

Fern: ”You’ve got it now?

Katie: “It’s so visible (sic) you can’t even see it. It’s so good. Cos I was a bit like, ‘I’m a bit young to have a scar that goes, there down and under but it’s really, really good.”

Fern: “So the scarring round the nipple because they have to replace the nipple. And there’s still sensation there?”

Katie: “Yeah, more then what they were before believe it or not. Which is really strange.”

Phillip: “And what does Pete think of them?”

Katie: “Well he doesn’t really get a chance to go near them cos I’m still a bit sore. Cos it’s quite a major op. It’s different to just having implants.”

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